The Repercussions of Social Media

Public service announcement that social media is fake.

I have had social media since I was 12 years old and it was a big thing at that age to have social media. All of my peers and my friends were just clicking, liking, posting and I wanted in on that. I wanted to be part of this community. Little did I know that that would be one of the root causes of the insecurities that I have today.

So I want to dive into why social media is toxic in the first place because without pinpointing it and just saying it's toxic doesn't mean anything. You hear all the time that social media is so toxic and you should delete your page. No one does it. I don't know why I'm talking because I have every social media platform downloaded onto my phone and I use them. Now granted, I do use them for promotional purposes for my blog and to stay in touch with family members. But again, Tiktok is not to stay in touch with my family. My great aunt Sally is not posting her daily life on Tiktok. I don't see cute baby pictures of my cousins on Tiktok, it is strictly for wasting time. Really, there's no true use to it.

To really pinpoint the toxicity of social media, I really would say body image. I really think that since social media has come out, it's been a big thing that you can hide behind your phone. Apps like face tune and Photoshop have contributed to being able to hide who you truly are.

There was this picture by a model whose name is Nicole Sahebi.She took a selfie, no makeup, no nothing, just a natural photo, and then took the same photo but edited it. She looks completely different but it looks natural. Her skin is smoother, her eyebrows are perfect, her lashes are perfect. If she has posted that everyone would have thought she really looked like that. This just goes to show how fake social media really is. It's so hard not being able to like implant these thoughts in young kids' minds. It's not only about women, even men face these thoughts. I'm just gonna speak specifically for women because I have faced it myself so I have more experience with it. But it's just it can be so awful to scroll through social media platforms, especially Tik Tok. I feel it's just such a horrible social media site. First of all, it spreads so much drama, it gets people famous that are horrible people. The algorithm allows anyone to be on your “For you page” and there are beautiful girls constantly on my page and it makes my self-confidence plummet through the floor. I could dig myself all the way to China with how low my self-confidence is.

I honestly have gotten better in recent months. It has been only been months since I've gotten these positive thoughts into my head. Like first of all, there are going to be people that are prettier than me, obviously, but we don't have to compare ourselves to them. That's what I was doing, I was saying, “Oh, she has long eyelashes, she has a skinnier waist, she has bigger lips, she has better hair.” No, her hair is not better, because it's just a different color. Her waist is not better because it's skinnier than mine. And her lips aren't better because they're bigger. I'm just as beautiful as she is.

It's horrible because we're all doing it and we're constantly pitting ourselves against each other. This is also why social media is super toxic because everyone's just against each other trying to be better. Like, whose Instagram feed is better, whose posts get more likes. There are people who have Instagram accounts just to see how their feed will look all together. I never did that and I live by that Because I really didn't care all that much. I just wanted to post pictures where I felt good about myself, which is all I've ever done.

I do not use Photoshop, I have never photoshopped any of my photos. But that's not to say that you're not allowed to. Obviously, I've taken pimples off my face, who doesn't. But I just feel like people are photoshopping too just to fit themselves into society's mold for women. They are making their lips bigger, making their eyelashes longer, and making their waists smaller to fit the mold. So now they are conforming themselves to the mold, which makes everyone else think that they have to do that too. It's just a horrible chain reaction. I don't know where it started but shouldn't have ever started at all.

I think the key toxic thing is just about body image, for me that's what it was. I had a horrible body image of myself. I used to have really bad acne and I would see all these girls with beautiful clear skin. Well, guess what? They didn't have clear skin. They had pimples just like me. It's so strange how we compare ourselves to one another. I feel like it's human nature to compare ourselves to others but now it's on a whole other level because it's in front of our faces every single day.

I've gotten to a point where I'm working out and feeling and looking super healthy. I have gained lots of muscle and I can officially say that I do love my body I used to get up every morning and move to the side to see how fat my stomach was or play with the fat on my stomach. Which there wasn't any fat because I wasn't fat. I don't even like the word fat like can we ban that word? But that's just how social media has been toxic for me and honestly, I've gotten into self-love and self-care and that's just like it's really made things a lot easier for me.

To not just dig into my insecurities, obviously, I still have them we're all gonna have insecurities, but it's not it's not like it used to be for me. One thing that I have done that's made it easier for me is surround myself with influencers or just, put post and people on my feed that genuinely makes me happy. So I have a lot of like people I really surround myself with which is just babies, to be honest. I love babies and they are all over my feed. Another person I love is Spencer Barbosa. She is amazing and is all about self-love and body positivity. I think all young girls should follow her. I spoke about her in my first-ever blog post about just how much I appreciate what she's doing in instilling this in the younger generation.

I feel like there's a lot of positivity happening with you know, influencers showing stretch marks and cellulite and all these normal things. I think those things are something we just need to realize are all normal. Like there's no one in the world that doesn't have imperfections but our imperfections make us beautiful and unique. It's so frustrating to see any girl feeling down on themselves. I think if you're feeling down on yourself, I think you'd need to go into the mirror and look yourself in the eyes and say “I am beautiful and my body is absolutely amazing.” Do that every morning and night trust me it will make you feel amazing.

So let's break down the most toxic out of social media. So top social media, we have Instagram, Snapchat, Tiktok, and VSCO. I would say Tiktok is the most toxic I don't think anything has to be said that it's constantly spoken about. Emma Chamberlain talked about it on her podcast Anything Goes about how toxic Tik Tok is and how she actually deleted it off of her phone. I have several friends that deleted Tik Tok from time to time because first of all, it just wastes our time and it causes mindless scrolling. There are also really no educational benefits to it it's not National Geographic and there are so many horrible things going on there and it just gets me riled up.

Second, I would say Instagram just because for me at least at my feed used to be just a bunch of pretty girls and I would just compare myself to them and it was extremely toxic for my self-image. The last thing is the likes, I don't think it's as prominent anymore because you can turn likes off altogether. I turned mine off because that's not something I need to be worrying about. That used to be the most stressful thing in my life and that is a first-world problem so it is so stupid. I do think Instagram has improved and had contributed less to toxic thoughts in my life.

Lastly, Vsco is not that bad. It's really just a photo-sharing platform. I love taking pictures of stuff, and I post it and then I get to see what other people are doing. I feel it's more of an art platform as well. I think that this isn't as bad as the rest of them especially since there are no likes and you cant see follower counts either. I would recommend using Vsco out of all the platforms.

So How do we make social media less toxic? There are so many people that are talking about it but yet nothing is getting done. Obviously, we have had some more steps forward, like taking away the likes on every platform. People that show, real body shapes, like we're not Barbies here but that's a whole nother conversation. I think really, what we have to do is there needs to be influencers and celebrities, that come out and say like, this is my body and this is not fake. There are so many influences and celebrities that are doing that and I just I adore that. But I feel like there are still a lot of people that are just showing young minds that they need to look a certain way and they need to Photoshop themselves to look this way. If they don't they don't fit the mold that society wants you to be in. So I really think we do have a lot more progress to do.

Honestly, the best thing to do is just delete it. Even removing it off of your home screen would be so beneficial. I feel like for me when I'm just sitting there bored and I look at my phone and I tap on an app I see. So if our brain isn't seeing it, it's less apt to click on it. So I feel like taking the social media platforms that you think cause the most toxicity in your life off your home screen, is a great step forward.

I cannot stress it enough that social media is so fake. I just wish I could hug every young girl in the world and tell her that she is wonderful and beautiful just the way she is. She also should not have to change the way she looks to fit in. I decided to start working out and get more muscle because it made me happy and I did it for myself. It did change the way my body looked and I'm so happy with the way I look but I didn't do that for social media. I didn't do that to please anyone. I did it for myself and I think that's the most important thing that if you don't want to change the way you look, don't you do not have to unless that's something that you think would make you happy. You are in control and you are the person who makes these decisions for yourself. I hope that this article reaches the right audience and reaches someone that needed to hear this. That's all I want to do is just kind of stress what I've been through and what has helped me through all of this.

Love,

Em

All photos from Pinterest